MonDAVEs Salutes The Winter Olympics

Well, last week I stated that I would be back with more Olympic stuff. Since I am a man of my word I now present “Ten Haikus About The Winter Olympics.” You’re welcome.

I
He flies on his board,
twisting, flipping and soaring,
then lands on his face.

II
The best of the best
do not always get the gold.
Sometimes it’s just luck.

III
I thought Monobob
was an album by Dylan.
Turns out it’s a sport.

IV
Mickaela Shiffrin
is America’s Sweetheart.
Take that, Taylor Swift!

V
Russia is doping
little girls to win the gold
which can’t be worth it.

VI
I haven’t felt too
patriotic lately but
then BAM Olympics

VII
Skating on ice is
a beautiful thing but that
Johnny Weir makes it.

VIII
Skiing and shooting.
How do these things relate and
why is it a sport?

IX
Man, I love curling!
That’s it, just wanted to say
that I love curling

X
Four years from now
I will watch this again but
Maybe not write poems.

Enjoy the rest of the games. See you next week for more MonDAVEs.

Wrapping Up Christmas With Trivia

Christmas will be here on just a few days, so as I wrap up the Christmas blog series for this year, let’s have a little fun and play some Christmas trivia. Some of these questions are harder than others, but there’s nothing here designed to hurt your brain. You can use these questions to quiz your family on Christmas, test your own knowledge, or scour the internet to try and prove me wrong. Which you can probably do because I am totally not double checking these answers. I’m way too busy for that. After all, there’s presents to be wrapped, carols to be sung, cookies to bake, and nog to be ignored in favor of pretty much any other drink.

Anyway, have a very Merry Christmas. Enjoy the quiz. Answers appear after the quiz.

DAVE’S BIG JOLLY CHRISTMAS QUIZ

What country is traditionally credited with starting Christmas trees?
What color Christmas will Elvis Presley be likely to have?
What is Ralphie’s little brother’s name in the movie “A Christmas Story?”
Which of Santa’s reindeer has the same name as another holiday mascot?
According to the song, what did my true love give me for the 8th day of Christmas?
What popular Christmas song was originally written for Thanksgiving (regular readers should know this one)?
What was the first company to use Santa Claus in advertising?
What was the original title of “‘Twas The Night Before Christmas”?
Christmas became a federal holiday in what year?
Who created the first electric light Christmas display?
What country is the Poinsetta native to?
What is the most popular meal for Christmas in Japan?
Which country is to blame for Eggnog?
How many candles are on an Advent wreath?
What is the best selling Christmas song of all time?
Which 3 words best describe The Grinch?
Three of Santa’s reindeer have names starting with the letter “D”. What are those names?
Who got run over by a reindeer?
What is the Dutch name for Santa Claus?
What is Frosty’s nose made out of?
How many wise men were present at Jesus’ birth?
What gets put in the stocking of a naughty child?
How many ghosts visit Scrooge in “A Christmas Carol?”
What was the name of Rudolph’s best friend (hint: he wanted to be a dentist)?
In the movie “Christmas Vacation”, how many lights were on the Griswold house?

ANSWERS TO DAVE’S BIG JOLLY CHRISTMAS QUIZ

Germany
Blue
Randy
Cupid
8 Maids A Milking
Jingle Bells
Coca Cola
“A Visit From St. Nicholas”
1870
Thomas Edison
Mexico
KFC
England
Four
White Christmas
The words are as follows, and I quote: “Stink, Stank, Stunk”
Dasher, Dancer, Donner
Grandma
Sinter Klaas
A Button
None
Coal
Four
Hermey (The Elf)
25,000

See you next week!

Christmas Movie Time

One of my favorite Christmas traditions is curling up on the couch and watching Christmas movies. Actually I’ll watch Christmas based anything, from the classic Rankin Bass cartoons of yesteryear to the yearly offerings of TV specials to spending hours down a You Tube rabbit hole of Vloggers, classic Christmas commercials, and whatever else may pop up.

But still, the movies are the main focus of holiday viewing. We all have our favorites, of course, and since this is my blog you’re about to read all about some of mine. Now y’all know how much I like lists, but instead of doing your standard movie ranking I’m going to switch it up and give you my own list of the most underrated and overrated Christmas movies.

Now, just because a movie is listed as being overrated in my eyes doesn’t necessarily make it bad, nor is an underrated movie a masterpiece. I’m just throwing out a few thoughts for your consideration. This list is purposefully short, as I decided to leave off some of the more controversial genres such as the Christmas horror film, and the purposefully crass R rated comedies that have become so prevalent over the last 20 years or so.

So here we go, with four movies you should maybe take a second look at, and four that could maybe use a breather.

DAVE’S FOUR FAVORITE UNDERRATED CHRISTMAS FILMS

4. MIXED NUTS (1994)
This one’s got a PG-13 rating and is a movie for grown-ups, but not in the “Bad Santa” kind of way. It is a dark comedy about a suicide hotline on Christmas Eve. Not exactly festive I know, but with a smart script and direction by Norah Ephron and a strong ensemble cast this one is a worth watching. Steve Martin is always enjoyable, as is Madeline Kahn (she was truly a gift to us all), and this is the movie that made me a fan of Rita Wilson. Add in Garry Shandling an Juliette Lewis, and you’ve got a win in my book. Okay, so I could do without Adam Sandler and his stupid voices but his time on screen is mercifully brief. Perhaps this film is a bit dated, and certainly not everyone’s cup of tea, but I enjoyed it quite a bit.

3. ARTHUR CHRISTMAS (2011)
The first cartoon on this list, I feel like this movie gets overlooked quite a bit. It’s certainly not perfect, but it is quite charming. It’s a pretty standard Christmas Eve emergency movie. It shows us Santa’s high tech North Pole headquarters that enables him to deliver all those gifts in one night. However, when he misses one deserving child it’s up to his goofy but loveable youngest son Arthur to save the day. This movie is very British in style and humor which may be why it’s not considered the classic it could be, but it speaks to my sensibilities very much. Inventive animation and a stellar cast (Hugh Laurie!) make “Arthur Christmas” a delight.

2. THE MAN WHO INVENTED CHRISTMAS (2017)
Not so much underrated as unknown, which is a pity because this is a great film. This movie is a different take on “A Christmas Carol” in that it is the story of how Charles Dickens wrote the tale, and helps bring to light how our modern ideas on Christmas were shaped by this book. Semi-biographical, fairly revisionist, and absolutely fantastical, “The Man Who Invented Christmas” is a true holiday treat. If you are a Dickens fan, you’ll enjoy seeing a portrait of your favorite author on screen. If you are a fan of “A Christmas Carol” you’ll enjoy seeing the story come together based on real life inspiration and Dickens’ vivid imagination. If you like Christmas movies, this is one that is a bit different from your standard holiday fare, but sure to bring a smile-even to old Scrooge himself.

1. FRED CLAUS (2007)
Okay, I understand why this movie gets dumped on, but I really don’t think it deserves quite the level of basing it regularly gets. This, like “Arthur Christmas”, is a look at Santa’s family, this time focusing on his ne’er-do-well brother Fred and the relationship between the two. Okay, so it’s got plot holes you could drive a truck through. Sure, it never really decides if it wants to be a family film or a snarky comedy. However, it is filled with some great acting (Paul Giamatti as Santa! John Michael Higgins! Vince Vaughn. Elizabeth Banks! Kathy Bates!), some neat camera tricks, and some really funny scenes. It still manages to feel really Christmassy by the end and that is all that matters to me.

DAVE’s FOUR MOST OVERRATED CHRISTMAS FILMS

4. THE POLAR EXPRESS (2004)
A lot of people really like this film, and I get it. The story is a good one at its heart, with a good message. Also, there is still something romantic about trains, especially one that takes you to see Santa. It’s just that the movie falls a bit flat. There should be a sense of wonder that never quite materializes, the movie is a little bit stodgy and boring instead of wondrous and inspiring. The animation was considered fairly cutting edge at the time, but it’s always just looked a little creepy to me. There is a lot of talent on display here, and the movie isn’t bad, but it’s still a miss overall.

3. DR. SEUSS’ HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (2000)
Full disclosure: I am not a Jim Carrey fan. I find his mugging and constant hammy chewing up of every scene to be obnoxious, tedious, and the opposite of anything that remotely resembles comedy. That being said, his role as The Grinch is the one time where I actually think it works. Try as I might, I can’t blame my dislike of this movie on Carrey and his antics. Part of my problem is that I believe a live action version of this classic book and tv special is just a really bad idea. You may capture the look to a degree, but you can never quite get it all right. The other issue I have is that expanding a short work for film is always risky, and while giving the Grinch a backstory is an intriguing idea, the writers really dropped the ball here conceptually. The original idea was that The Grinch detested Christmas because he didn’t understand it, although the Whos down in Whoville knew the true meaning and celebrated it gifts or no. In this version The Grinch is against the capitalisms of the Whos’ Christmas, and their cruelness and insensitivity. All the joy and love of the original is gone, replaced by a world wearines and what really feels like a mean spirited take on the holiday as a whole, only to be cleared up at the end because you can’t not do the heart growing three sizes thing. This movie is a mess, and a wasted opportunity.

2. HOME ALONE 2: LOST IN NEW YORK (1992)
Most sequels are not as beloved as their predecessors, and that does hold true here, but most fans would agree that “Home Alone 2” is a worthy successor. Ehhh, I guess. I mean, it’s not a terrible movie, but it’s really just a retread of the first movie which, let’s face it, had its flaws, but is entertaining enough to deserve some rewatch love. For some reason though, the tone of this sequel comes across as being much darker, and the slapstick comedy is not as cartoonish. It looks like it hurts. There are a few bright spots, and Tim Curry is always a delight, but that’s not enough to make this any more than an obvious cash grab. Be that as it may, there are still people who love this movie and marathon it with the first one every year.

1. ELF (2003)
Okay…wait. Hold on. Calm down. Hear me out. I like “Elf”. I really do. I have seen it multiple times, and it makes me laugh. It gives me the feels, and I think it deserves to be considered a classic. So why do I say it’s overrated? Because it is. Here’s a few reasons as to why. 1.) Look, everybody loves Buddy’s innocence, but his obnoxiousness gets a little wearing. I can sympathize with his Dad, for sure. 2.) A grown man in an elf costume is funny once but not after repeated viewings. 3.) Come on, the shower scene is pretty cringe, even if it is an innocent mistake. Otherwise, I like the movie a lot. I just don’t feel like I need to watch it yearly, and I get a little tired of being bombarded with Elf quotes and merchandising every year. It’s just too much. I kind of wish it wasn’t such a success (no offense to the film makers or excellent cast). If it was just this little, silly movie that most people didn’t know about and you kind of had to find and appreciate on your own, I think that would make it a little more special. Which, of course, makes me a cotton headed ninny-muggins. I just don’t want to wear it on a t shirt.

All right, now that I have thoroughly annoyed you by picking apart your favorite movie (or, hopefully, inspired you to see a new one) I’m going to wrap it up for this edition of MonDAVEs. join me next week, when I have absolutely nothing planned and will have to wing it.

P.S.-Look for a special “Spider Man” post this weekend-guest blogger in tow!

We Came, We Saw, We REVIEWED This Movie!

It’s another Dad/Daughter movie review featuring 13 year old guest blogger Tessa! This blog is in danger of becoming a permanent review site, but we’ll just leave that here for right now.

Anyway, this week we are reviewing the newest film in the Ghostbusters series entitled Ghostbusters: Afterlife. It is a direct sequel to Ghostbusters 2, and a probable reboot of the series at large. For those who may not be aware, a plot summery follows. A single mother and her to kids move to an inherited house in a small town where they discover their grandfather’s connection to the Ghostbusters and, naturally, a supernatural threat to mankind. So there, that’s nice and vague. As usual, we will be as spoiler free as possible but there may be a few small ones. The rating system is as follows: 1-5 Daves or 1-5 Y’s (Y standing for Yasss!), 5 being the best.

GHOSTBUSTERS: AFTERLIFE: 4.5 Daves/ Tessa: 4.5 Y’s

Tessa: I liked this movie a lot more than I thought I would. It’s not like I expected it to be bad (it has Paul Rudd, Finn Wolfhard, and Mckenna Grace it couldn’t not be good), but I was pleasantly surprised at how good this movie was. Critics have been taking apart this movie (because they’re critics and that’s what they do), but I actually enjoyed it. I’ve seen the first Ghostbusters exactly once, and that was like a year ago, so I didn’t really expect to be able to follow along when the plot got reliant on what had been established in the first movie, but I understood it pretty well. It’s an enjoyable movie for any level of Ghostbusters fan, which I liked.

I loved every character, and it was a really funny movie as well. I expected there to be a bit of humor for Paul Rudd, but it would be a mostly action movie. But there was a lot of comedy, and it was done well enough that I didn’t think it was too much comedy. And I love how the new generation of Ghostbusters are all kids. As a kid, it makes me happy. It was very enjoyable and I really liked it!

Dave: As Tessa mentioned, the critics are not being very kind to this movie, and I understand why. Yes, this is a nostalgia trip that is uber-focused on fan service. Yes, the plot is really predictable. Yes, it goes for the heart more than the laughs and is more of a big budget adventure movie than straight comedy.

It is also a wonderful movie, and I loved every frame. I did come in with limited expectations, but found myself engrossed in the film quickly. I grew up with both the Ghostbusters movies and even though I don’t necessarily rewatch them on a regular basis, nor would I put them into a top ten, they are part of my movie DNA. I don’t know if I realized how much I loved these characters until I saw this film. I was really pleased with the way they handle the nostalgia for us original fans, and I think that this movie makes an excellent entry point for a new generation of Ghostbusters fans.

Speaking of the new generation, let’s talk about the new stars in the film. These kids are all quite relatable not only as characters but the actors themselves were all extremely likeable. McKenna Grace is very good in this film, she is one to watch for sure. Finn Wolfhard and Paul Rudd pretty much just show up and do what they do in every film they are in, and that’s no complaint. Worked for Bill Murray, right?

So sure, I could sit here and nitpick about some of the film’s flaws, but in my eyes the flaws are minimal and forgivable. Don’t let the professional critics fool you-listen to us.

T: Facts.

D: It may not be the laugh a minute movie that some would expect, but the humor in the film works just fine. This movie has a lot of heart, and true affection for both it’s characters and the original material. Go in with an open mind and I think you’ll find it quite enjoyable.

T: Also, I loved that there were some Marvel-esque cut-scenes! I just got the cutscene vibes from this movie (probably because a lot of it felt like a Marvel movie), and I was super excited when there were two cutscenes during the credits! My cutscene instincts never fail me.

D: Yes, those were fun! I’m not sure if they were parodying Marvel or if they just wanted to put more stuff in, but it works either way. It’s definitely worth sticking around for the extra scenes. There are some good cameos too.

Also, not gonna lie, I did tear up a little. Which is what you want from a comedy.

Go see this one in the theaters, we think you’ll really enjoy it on the big screen. It will work if you stream it or watch the blu-ray when it becomes available (I’ll be adding it to my collection, no doubt) but this is a good one for the theaters.

Bottom line: If there is an alternate universe where Steven Spielberg made a Ghostbusters movie during his heyday, this would be that film.

Okay, that’s it for this one. Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone (maybe go to the movies over the holiday weekend?) and join me next week for more MonDAVEs.

Settling The Great Debate

All right America, it’s time to pick a side. This debate has raged on long enough. I’m drawing a line in the sand. I’ve got my two cents and I’m ready to throw down! I’m about to bring the fire, and set y’all straight once and for all. Here we go. You ready? Dig this:

Conifers are better than deciduous trees.

Yeah, I said it. Now I’m gonna prove it.

First of all, I had to look up how to spell “deciduous” just then, so that’s a point to conifers right off the bat. Easier to spell, easier to love.

Second, conifers have more varieties than most folks believe. In fact, there are over five hundred varieties! Many people think of conifers as just the evergreen Pine or Fir trees we are so familiar with, but the conifer family includes such diverse trees as Spruce, Hemlocks, the Larch, Redwoods, and the Giant Sequoya. Ever driven or walked through the Sequoias in California? You’ve been through a conifer, my friend, and probably snapped a pic to remember the experience.*

Also, the tallest tree in the world is the Hyperion, which is a Coastal Redwood otherwise known as, you guessed it, a conifer! and bigger is better, so there!

Another thing to love about conifer trees is that they are so good for the home. Conifers planted close to the home can help with insulation of the house, and help to protect from nasty weather.

Now, in fairness, it should be pointed out that conifers do not change color in the fall. So we do have to begrudgingly give that one to the deciduous trees as it is quite pretty. However, conifers’ leaves don’t change because they DON’T HAVE LEAVES in the first place. Which I think is quite considerate.

Let’s talk leaves for a moment. Most deciduous trees lose all of their leaves in Autumn/early winter. All of them. Most conifers (or Evergreens in this case) lose only a fraction of their needles each year-and some don’t lose them yearly at all. There are exceptions to this rule on both sides, but for the most part we can give the edge here to the conifer. Okay, so you may have to duck a pine cone or two, but that’s just good old Mother Nature seeding out her favorite tree. Plus, you can make crafts with them to decorate for the Holidays.

And since we’re on the topic of holidays…which type of tree is it that is used to celebrate Christmas again? Oh yeah…Evergreens. CONIFERS!!! If it’s good enough to celebrate the birth of Christ, it’s good enough for me. Just maybe don’t look too hard into the theology of that one. Aaannnywayyyy….

I believe we now have more than enough evidence to illustrate the superiority of the conifer trees. So I will leave you with the words of a little band called They Might Be Giants and a quote from their anthem “C Is For Conifers” (aka the greatest song ever):

“Most with cones for seeds,
Most with needles for leaves,
C is for Conifers
My kind of trees“

Whew, glad that’s settled! Come back soon for more truth bombs and intelligent discourse on hot button topics right here in MonDAVEs!!!

*This is an admittedly silly post, but the Giant Redwood Sequoias of California really are endangered by wildfire as we speak. Consider donating to the National Parks Service to not only help save the Sequoias but also to help maintain all of our wonderful National Parks. https://www.nps.gov/index.htm