Well, here we are. Another Monday is upon us, and with it comes yet another one of these messages from my brain-box sure to delight, amaze, and enlighten. Okay, probably not, but at the least it should give you a nice distraction for a few minutes.
I’ve got a few topics simmering away waiting to be presented soon but I checked on them a little while ago and they’re not quite ready yet. Still, a deadline’s a deadline, right? A commitment’s a commitment, a promise is a promise, and I promised you faithful MonDAVEs readers that I’d be back this week. So I needed a topic but quick. I have decided to turn to outside help.
This week I am using a “Blog Ideas Generator” from hubspot.com. The directions were quite simple. I was to enter up to five unique nouns and the generator would shoot me back a week of blog ideas. I knew all those hours of playing Mad Libs would pay off someday!!! Anyway, this process went about as well as you’d expect, with fairly predictable results. Still, it’s a fun experiment, so I’ll walk you through this experience by letting you know which nouns I entered, what the results were, and give a brief analysis of the same.
Five Random Nouns:
-Dogs
-Horseshoe
-Ballerina
-Salsa
-Flower
The results:
- This week’s Top Stories About Flower
Well, it’s Winter here, so there probably aren’t many flower stories, but let me check. (Googles “Flower News”) Oh, well, yeah, okay, it’s almost Valentine’s day so there are a few articles about how people will spend stupid money on flowers next week (almost $26 billion all told) and how Miley Cyrus won a Grammy for her song called “Flowers”. Not bad for a slow news cycle I guess. Maybe we’ll check back in Spring. - Horseshoe Explained In Fewer Than 140 Characters
Oh, well, yeah, okay, um… here goes: “A horseshoe is a shoe for horses which we somehow turned into a game played at picnics which nobody understands except that one guy who’s really into it.” How’d I do? - Will horseshoe Ever Rule The World?
In what context? Like, do I think horseshoe will ever become the biggest game in the world? Nah, there’s not enough flash to the game, and corporate sponsorships would ruin the purity of the whole thing. But then, I do live within driving distance of the National Horseshoe Pitchers Hall Of Fame And Museum (true) so it must be a fairly popular game. I mean, bowling is televised and up for Olympic consideration, so who knows?
Or, wait, did I read this wrong? Is the question implying that there may be a horseshoe that becomes sentient and will lead a successful campaign for world domination? You know, there was a point when I would have said no, but nothing has surprised me since like 2019, so sure. - The Next Big Thing In Horseshoe
Why the hell is this generator so obsessed with horseshoe? Is this the best AI can do? Pretty pathetic if you ask me. Unless it knows something we don’t…which would lend support for the world domination thing…hmmm. Now I’m kinda freaked out. You know, horseshoes are supposed to be good luck. Well, for us humans anyway. I’m not sure how the horses feel about it. Look, can we move on to a different topic, please? - Salsa: Expectations Vs. Reality
Ooh, here we go. There are few better snacks than chips and salsa, and few worse things than getting a less than satisfactory salsa dip. I’m not sure about you, but I always expect the salsa to be nice and thick, with the onions and pepper and whatnot clearly identifiable on my chip. I can’t stand a thin salsa. I mean, I’ll eat it, obviously, but I won’t get a second bowl. Also, what’s up with the smooth, pulverized salsa you get at low end restaurants? It’s not thick or thin, but there are no recognizable bits, and there is always a little runny stuff left over. It’s weird.
Then there’s the heat factor. When I dip my chips into a salsa I expect lots of flavor, but not too much kick. A little is fine on the back end, but don’t burn my tongue unless you warn me first that it’s going to be a hot one. Then I can prepare with the right drink and some extra chips at the ready.
Plus, what’s the deal with all the fire roasted salsas I am encountering now? I don’t care for that. It tastes like somebody burned the salsa somehow. Again, warn me before I dig in. My favorite salsa variety is Peach Salsa (particularly Mrs. Renfro’s), but the fire roasted versions some brands use do it no favors.
Oh, I should emphasize that this section pertains only to the standard red salsa varieties. I never touch that green stuff. Y’all are on your own with that.
All right, there you have it, five blogs in one! Sort of. More like two with subsections. Anyway, that’s what I get for trusting a random generator I guess. Interesting that it completely ignored both “dogs” and “ballerina” as topics, since they would actually make pretty decent ideas. Still, I am a pet owner, and my daughter is very much into dance, so chances are these topics will come up at some point anyway.
Take care of yourselves. Back soon with more stuff.
P.S.-The horseshoe sandwich is also a delicacy (?) originating in Springfield, Illinois involving toasted bread, beef patties, french fries, and cheese sauce served open faced mostly to college students and people who are out way later than their normal bedtime.
P.P.S. Also…a horseshoe crab is a thing. Make your own joke, I don’t know. Just figured it belonged here somewhere.
MonDAVEs with Dave Brink 